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Fågeln som gör din kväll frustrerande

”Kan du vattna växterna i trädgården?”
En oskyldig fråga, men en fråga som gjorde min kväll frustrerande och innehållande ett stort antal förbannande över fåglars bristande intelligens. 
Jag stod ute och vattnade växterna i trädgården, och jag hade lämnat dörren öppen. När jag tittade in genom fönster till vardagsrummet såg jag en liten fågel som satt och tittade på mig. Då hade den flugit in genom dörren och verkade uppenbarligen trivas väldigt bra där i fönster. Jag fortsatte att vattna ett tag och tänkte att fågeln skulle flyga ut, men icke. När jag kom in satt den kvar där och ville definitivt inte flytta på sig. 
Hur skulle jag få ut den söta lilla fågeln? Den måste säkert vara livrädd över att inte hitta ut. Jag hittade därför ett långt föremål och började putta på fågeln lite lätt för att leda den mot dörren, men den ville inte flytta på sig. Till slut flyttade den på sig, fast inte dit jag ville. Den hoppade istället bakom massor med tavlor. Jag fick då flytta bort alla tavlor och puttade på den lite till. Den började då hoppa lite, men precis när den hade kommit till dörren, som stod på vid gavel, valde den att i panik istället flyga förbi dörren och sätta sig på en hylla i köket. Där satt den i en halvtimme och hyperventilerade, så jag lät den sitta där och lugna ner sig i hopp om att den skulle flyga ut själv, men icke. Det blev därför till att putta på den lite igen, men då flög den tillbaka till ursprungsfönstret. Jag fick därför göra om samma procedur igen och åter igen flög fågeln in i köket och gömde sig bakom massa pastaburkar.
Nu började jag bli rejält frustrerad. Hur ska jag få ut fågeljäveln utan att behöva döda den? Det blev till att plocka ner alla burkar från hyllan och börja putta på fågeln igen, och åter igen flög den förbi den öppna dörren och satte sig intryckt mot rutan på ursprungsfönstret igen. Jag fick då tips från Jens att ta på mig arbetshandskar och bära ut fågeln. Detta skulle nog ha varit det enklaste alternativet från början, men det krävs att modiga Dennis ska bli frustrerad och tröttna på att springa efter en fågel i två timmar för att han ska ta till de effektiva metoderna. På med handskarna blev det i alla fall, tog grepp om fågeljäveln, släppte ut den och stängde snabbt dörren medan jag gav den arga blickar. Brydde sig fågeln? Självklart inte. Den satt kvar där på altanen och tittade på mig. Inte ens ett tack fick jag. Otacksamma jävel…

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